By Daphne Thompson (my wife)
My husband started this. My twin sister followed. And now it’s my turn…
For those of you who may not know me, let me take a sec to briefly introduce myself. My name is Daphne. I’m an identical twin. I’ve been married to the love of my life for four years (as of next week). We have a beautiful baby boy named Declan, who’s 19 months old. And we recently added a precious little puppy to our growing family. His name is Spirit.
Let’s see, am I forgetting anything? Oh yea, pretty sure I left out the fact that we ALL live together. That’s right…me, my hubby, my baby, my puppy, my twin sister and her 4-year old goldendoodle, Pretzel, all share one heck of a cuddly home together. And you know what? I kinda like it. Actually, I absolutely LOVE IT and I wouldn’t change it for the world! Ask the two of them and they’ll likely have a different opinion on things, but ask me 10 days out of 10, and I’m going to tell you that I love it because I do! Come on, if you could have your cake and eat it too, wouldn’t you?
I know most of you reading this right now are probably thinking how the HECK do I do it? I’ll try my best to explain, but let me first preface my attempt with the following: I will definitely fall short, so my apologies in advance.
Okay, here we go –
Being a twin is no question, my BIGGEST blessing from the Good Lord up above. (Yes, my husband and son are a close second and third, BUT my sister tops it off as my biggest blessing!) Why? I’ll tell you why. I am 100% confident that the Lord gave us each other so we could get through our parent’s devastating divorce back when we were ten. No need to go into any details here. Just know that both of us leaned on each other like rocks and likely wouldn’t have made it through without the other. Period. (And for the record, no I’m not saying that I love my twin more than I love my husband or my son. It’s tied fair and square…I swear!)
That said, Caitlin and I share a bond that’s stronger than super glue (you know…the kind that actually works). When you go through a life-changing traumatic experience with someone, your relationship, by nature, will carry a bond stronger than any other relationships you have. Don’t get me wrong, my hubby and I have definitely been through the ringer, but something about childhood trauma trumps them all.
Okay, okay, back to Caitlin.
Folks always ask us if it’s weird having an exact look-alike, someone who thinks like I do, feels pain when I do, finishes my sentences for me, never outstays her welcome (you get the point). Well here’s the answer plain and simple – I don’t know life any other way (and would never, ever want to) so NO, IT’S NOT WEIRD! As far as I’m concerned, being a twin is as normal as normal gets and it’s the coolest thing in the whole wide world. I wouldn’t trade it for my own life. Seriously…if someone was holding a gun up to my head and told me they’d let me live if, and only if, I pressed the magic button that would miraculously make me a non-twin, I’d tell them to stick it where the sun don’t shine and go ahead and pull the trigger.
Oh, and did I mention that Caitlin was my first love? That’s right folks. I said it! (And no I’m not talking about anything inappropriate here so go ahead and get that one outta your minds if you were about to go there.) Unless you’re a twin yourself, I’m sure this sounds really, REALLY weird. But, if you don’t mind me asking, please go ahead and do us both a favor here – accept the fact that you do not and will not ever understand the dynamic, and then stop trying. Simple as that.) There is absolutely NOTHING that can replace the love or the bond that twins share. Nuff said!
Enters Mr. Thomas Wells Thompson…
The love of my life for as long as I can remember and the sexiest man I’ve ever laid eyes on! Okay, okay, I guess Wells was really my first true love if you’re talking about the kissy, kissy kind. We share quite a fairy tale story ourselves and have been through trials like you wouldn’t believe, but by the grace of God, we made it through and tied the knot on December 3, 2011.
Now he may try to tell you he had no idea what it would be like marrying twins, and I’d have to call his bluff immediately! I’m almost positive I made sure to fully disclose to him before we walked down the aisle that to marry me meant to marry my twin. And then I told him that if he really loved me like he said he did, this would not be a deal breaker. (After all, they’ve known each other since diapers too so it shouldn’t be that big of a deal, right?) Guess it wasn’t cause here we are today J (Side note – Caitlin often asks me why I didn’t disclose the same info to her pre-marriage, and I always tell her it’s because she had no choice in the matter. Wells could have chosen to call it quits before it was too late. Caitlin, on the other hand, was born into it.)
Now I’ll admit that none of us, in our wildest dreams, could have ever anticipated that one day we’d all be living together. So to my husband’s credit, I can definitely understand why it’s getting just a wee bit old two years in. BUT, Romans 8:28 promises us that God has a mysterious way of working ALL things for the good of those who love him and are called according to His purpose!
So, I figured a great way to close this baby out would be to list off the top three things God has taught each of us as a result of living together, thus summarizing how He’s worked it for our good.
What I’ve learned:
- My husband and sister are both SAINTS!
- It definitely takes a village to raise a family. There has never been truer saying than this! (Thank you Caitlin for selflessly loving and serving my family wholeheartedly these past 19 months!)
- Community is messy and ugly and tough but beautiful and fulfilling all at the same time.
What Wells has learned (check out his take on things here if you haven’t already):
- Living with twins has forced me to love more like Jesus.
- Standing up for what you believe is important even when people disagree.
- Twins are freakin psycho!
What Caitlin has learned (check out her take on things here if you haven’t already):
- Sacrificial living – serving is more important than sleep (but sleep deprivation sucks)!
- Guys are disgusting (flush already)!
- Ear plugs work better than ear muffs.
And that’s a wrap. Thanks for reading J